Be Still

      In the Fall of 2005, I saw the most precious little baby I had ever laid eyes on. She was unlike my own babies in that she had black hair and those beautiful Asian eyes. She was my friend Nicole Chenoweth's newly adopted daughter, Gracie, from China. I was absolutely mesmerized by her. I don't think I had ever seen an Asian baby up close and all I could do was stare into her little face and take her in. That day was a turning point in my life. God planted a seed in my heart that day that would begin to grow from a dream into an eventual reality. He had a huge plan in store for the Colbert family and we were just getting started.
      Over the next few months, all I could do was think about adoption. All I could focus on was every Asian child I saw on TV or in the mall. All I could talk about to Kelly was having another baby (or adopting one). I had serious "tunnel vision". I prayed like I have never prayed before. I knew God had planted this in my heart for a reason. All I knew was God wanted us to give another child a home, whether it be a teenager, a child from the United States, or a baby from another country (any country). I was open to whatever and however God wanted to use us. The only problem was that Kelly did not feel the same way. He told me he just wasn't "feelin' it." He was like many husbands and just fine with our four children we already had. He did not want to add to the family circus and was good with the chaos and fun we already endured.
       Finally, one morning in the shower (yes the shower), I was praying and asking God to please show me what He wanted me to do. I was crying out to Him like never before. "God, please tell me!! I can't take this anymore!!" In the quiet of that moment I saw in my mind the words "Be still and wait patiently on the Lord." I sat for a minute and couldn't believe it. He told me to be still? What in the world did that mean? I am never still. I can't BE STILL. I have to be doing and moving and doing some more. That's just how I am. So, I went on with my day, pondering over what He was trying to tell me. 
       A few days later it was our anniversary and I went to a christian book store to find Kelly an anniversary gift. I was searching for that perfect, thoughtful, touching, sappy gift to give him when I was drawn to a large black and white picture of an oak tree. I walked over to it and read it. To my amazement it said, "Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him." I was getting the point. For some reason, God was wanting me to stop and be still. I did buy the picture for Kelly and he loved it, but he didn't know the whole meaning behind it. 
       The next Sunday morning we were in our worship service and our music minister began singing a solo. To my amazement again, he sang a song called "Be Still". Unbelievable!!! OK. Can I scream now!! I get it Lord!! I am going to be quiet now and stop talking about adopting and babies and worrying about what to do. No more!! I explained what I had learned from the Lord to Kelly and told him I was going to "be still" and not talk about it anymore and not worry about it anymore. From then on I was going to let God handle it and let Him do whatever He had in mind. It was time to totally surrender and "let go and let God." Pretty tough for me!!       
         Over the next few years I tried my best to obey God's direction with a few little exceptions. Every once in a while I would mention a word or two to Kelly about adoption or point him in the direction of an adorable little Asian child I saw.  He would just roll his eyes at me and laugh. He still wasn't feelin' it. I began to forget about the whole thing, began to give up and didn't mention it much anymore.....UNTIL.....an earthquake hit Haiti in January of 2010. Over the course of several days, we heard on the news of thousands of children who were being found parentless and were going to be in need of adopting. Ugh oh!! Here we go again. 
        I mentioned it to Kelly one night and told him of all of the orphans in Haiti. He said I should get online and look into it and that he would adopt one in a "heartbeat." Oh my Goodness!!! Had he lost his mind? I couldn't believe what he was saying. I was beside myself. I got online and checked the situation out immediately. To my dismay, the adoptions were closed......but guess what? They were still open to China. Just sayin'! 
        We began a life-changing event at our church called the "Daniel Fast", preparing for the Disciple Now weekend that our youth were going to be participating in. During this fast, we were to commit to eat the foods only Daniel ate and pray at the same time for our youth and everyone involved. During this time, Kelly and I decided to also pray about adoption. We wanted to totally bathe this idea in prayer and knew God would guide us as to what to do. Over the next month of the fast, we spent time every day studying God's word and praying. Many times God showed me scripture and revealed to me His will that we adopt. I just wasn't sure if He was revealing this to Kelly. One morning I was praying and begging God to please let me know if Kelly was feeling the same way. Within a few hours, he called me and said, " Hey Honey, I just wanted you to know that at my bible study this morning I asked all the guys to pray for our adopting a baby." I knew at that moment this was God's will for us. Kelly and I continued to pray about it together. Several days later, he called me and said he thought we should go ahead and send in our application. Yippee!!! On February 22, 2010, we sent it in.
          After so many years had passed, God was preparing and paving the way for us to adopt our little girl. God's plan is so much better than ours and my being still gave God time to create the exact little one He had for our family. Thank you Lord for your timing.